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Polysecure
with Jessica Fern
(Season 3 | Episode 108)
[TESSA] What is a “polysecure” relationship like?
Is there trauma (from childhood or adulthood) that can stand in the way of the “secure” poly relationship? What if one of the partners wants to pull back, keeping their partner at arm’s length?
How do you deal with a “flight response” from one of the partners? Jessica, Amir and I discuss all endpoints of the poly spectrum in this highly useful guide to building a secure poly relationship.
ABOUT JESSICA FERN
I grew up in a neighborhood well acquainted with violence and a family considerably impacted by divorce, multi-generational trauma, substance abuse and interpersonal discord. The effects of these experiences were challenging for many years, but through the therapeutic process, I was able to reclaim my strength, build resiliency, create relationships that I was nourished by and live from a heart that was open instead of fearfully protected. This journey began with investing my time and resources in workshops, retreats and therapy in order to heal myself, rewire my reactivity, re-invent certain relationships, while letting go of others and comfortably stand in the ways I’m different.
This process wasn’t easy or linear (and is always ongoing!), but eventually evolved into committing my life to the study and application of conflict resolution, therapy, transformation, communication and body-based mindfulness practices. My personal and professional journey has led me to the knowing that I find the most meaning and inspiration through collaborating with others who are looking for growth and change in their lives or relationships—people who no longer want to be held back from what the past, culture, or norms say should be, but instead want to live through their preferred expressions of self, relationship and reality.
Click HERE for Jessica’s Education and Training
POLYSECURE WITH JESSICA FERN
Attachment theory has entered the mainstream, but most discussions focus on how we can cultivate secure monogamous relationships. What if, like many people, you’re striving for secure, happy attachments with more than one partner? Polyamorous psychotherapist Jessica Fern breaks new ground by extending attachment theory into the realm of consensual nonmonogamy. Using her nested model of attachment and trauma, she expands our understanding of how emotional experiences can influence our relationships.


More Episodes about A Polyamory Lifestyle
Resources for You
We want to provide you with support and many resources for your own Open Nesting Journey. Our resource page has so much to offer as does our private discussion group on Facebook about queerness and other topics of interest:
About Tessa
Tessa Krone is the engine behind and the face of The Open Nesters.
Tessa holds an MA in Consciousness Studies and is a speaker, coach, program and journey facilitator & leader, author and, of course, Podcaster.
Her offerings are based in her mission to help people open to their most self-expressed, loving selves. Tessa’s specialties include embodiment from all the senses and elements of our inner and outer lives, ranging from mindfulness, dance, play, and sensory exploration in nature. If she had one superpower, it would be to help people, especially as they age, to live more open hearted lives.

Please email Tessa to make a connection. If you like, please answer the question:
What do you need to OPEN your NEST? In your LIFE. In your BODY. In your SPIRIT. Do you need MORE…
- Adventure
- Freedom of Expression
- Exploration and Fun
- Body Movement
- New circles of friends
- Deep love relationships
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